多妻有烦恼

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Although most countries adopt monogamy and clearly forbid the marriage form that violates the rights and interests and dignity of women -- polygamy, when we go through the statute books of western countries, we can still see the rationality of polygamy among the words and between the lines.

According to the laws of western countries, if a wife is not fertile and does not want to divorce, she can only suffer in silence the fate of no descendants. However, if polygamy is approved, the divorce can be avoided and the family can still carry on the family line.

What’s more, Muslin husbands bear exactly same lawful duties for the second, third and fourth wives as well as their children, which prevents the wives with diseases from discrimination. In Islamic countries, the second marriage is probably a solution accepted in every aspect, because men can have normal lives and at the same time shoulder the reasonability of taking care of the wives.

虽然大多数国家实行“一夫一妻”制，明文禁止侵犯女性权益与尊严的婚姻形式――“一夫多妻”，但翻开西方国家的法典，从条文字句之间，依然也能看到“一夫多妻”制的合理性。

根据西方的法律，假若妻子没有生育能力，又不同意离婚，就只能忍受没有后代的命运。但若“一夫多妻”制获得认可，那么离婚的事便可避免，也能孕育后代，传宗接待。

此外，穆斯林丈夫对他的第二任、第三任和第四任妻室及她们所生的子女均有完全的法定义务，防止了对身患疾病的妻室的歧视，在伊斯兰国家，第二次婚姻则可能是各方面都认可的办法，男性既可以拥有正常的生活，还能承担对妻室的责任。

Even so, we can still see the disadvantages of this kind of marriage system through the daily life of polygamist family. The social status of women is very low and they’ve become “baby machine”. “Fighting for husband’s love” becomes regular. Turkish man Athrun has 5 wives. He said when he was 64 years’ old that if he have the chance to choose again, he would rather choose only one wife. The most irritating thing for Athrun was that his wives were always jealous of each other and making scenes all the time.

Polygamy makes woman become man’s private property and men can do whatever they want. The Independent of UK once reported that when harvest little during droughts, in order to repay the loan, an Indian farmer sold his wife “cheaply” to his moneylender. The only thing both parties needed to do was signing the “marriage contract”. The deal can be done after signing.

即便如此，透过“一夫多妻”制家庭的生活，可以看到这种婚姻制度的弊端。女子地位低下，女子沦为了“生子机器”,“争风吃醋”是家常便饭。土耳其男子阿斯兰拥有5个妻子，64岁时他曾表示，如果让他再选择一次，他宁愿只有一个妻子。最令阿斯兰头疼的地方是妻子之间总是相互嫉妒，经常互相找碴闹事。

“一夫多妻”制容易让女性成为男人的私人物品，任由处理。英国《独立报》曾报道，因旱灾颗粒无收时，为了还贷，印度农民将自己的妻子“贱卖”给放债人，买卖双方只需签订“婚姻契约”，签字画押后即可一手交钱，一手交人。

Another disadvantage of polygamy is that there bound to be someone who cannot find a wife. Under the circumstances where the gender distribution is roughly equal, if men with more wealth and higher social status marry over one wife, it means men with lower social status and poverty cannot find a wife. It, to a large extent, leads to the social unrest and causes social problems like sexual violation and rape.

“There is another phenomenon in South Africa that men leave their wives in tribes to seek jobs in cities. Many people just never go back home since then, and his children can only be raised by their mothers”, reported by the Peninsula City News of China. Polygamy not only increases the pressure of women by forcing women to raise the children and shoulder the burdens of lives, but also deprives children’s rights of receiving good-quality cultivation and education, which is harmful to the development of society.

有些人必然娶不到老婆，将是“一夫多妻”制的又一弊端。在男女比例大致相等的情况下，如果财富和地位居前的男人娶了多个妻子，意味着地位低下和经济贫困的男人娶不到老婆。这在很大程度上导致社会的不稳定，并引发害、等社会问题。

“南非还有这样一种现象，在部落中男子撇下家里的妻子去城市里面打工，不少人就此消失了，他的孩子只能由孩子的母亲来抚养。”中国《半岛都市报》报道。“一夫多妻”制带来的不仅仅是增加女性的压力，逼迫女性为了抚育儿女，必须用羸弱的身躯扛起繁杂的生活，更重要的是子女在这样的家庭得不到很好地培养和教育，不利于整个社会的发展。

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The Sage Aristotle came up with the initial moral of “monogamy”: it’s a shameful behavior for husband or wife to have sexual intercourse with unmarried partner. As modern civilization develops, the social status of women rise gradually, and the wish of liberating women and realizing equality between man and woman has been accepted by mainstream society. In 2011, the ruling authorities of Libya adopted “polygamy” and most media thought it was a retrogression of the history of Libya as well as the social status of women. Nowadays, some European countries have gradually abolished polygamy and even in Africa, polygamy starts to become a controversial topic.

The family history of mankind has gone through the three basic stages of communal marriage, pairing marriage and monogamy. The motive behind the long way to “monogamy” is the progress of social productivity and highly developed social material civilization.

先哲亚里士多曾提出了最初的“一夫多妻”制道德：丈夫或妻子与非婚伴侣发生性关系，都是一种可耻的行为。随着现代文明的发展，女性地位逐渐提升，解放广大妇女、实现男女平等的良好愿望，为主流社会所认同。2011年，利比亚执政当局提出“一夫多妻”制，大部分媒体认为，这是利比亚历史的倒退，也是妇女社会地位的倒退。目前，一些欧洲国家陆续废除了“一夫多妻”制,即便是在非洲，“一夫多妻”制也开始成为争议性的话题。

人类的家庭形式经历了群婚制、对偶婚制、“一夫多妻”制三种基本形式，走到今天主流的“一夫一妻制”的背后，是社会生产力不断进步，社会物质文明高度发展的结果。

Article 293 of the Canada Constitution regulates that polygamy, no matter one husband with multiple wives or one wife with multiple husbands, is illegal and prohibited. In 1926, Turkey started to implement the new civil law, and it abolished polygamy, regulating man and woman have the equal rights of religion, marriage, divorce, and child custody.

Malaysia is the first Islamic country abolishing polygamy. Early in 1990s, they’ve already stopped letting married men marry someone else.

Although Tunisia is an Islamic country, polygamy was abolished not long after the establishment of the country. Women have served important positions in society. Benin also declared in the early years to abolish this outdated system that violates the rights and interests of women.

加拿大的刑法第293款称“一夫多妻”或“一妻多夫”婚配均属非法，并明令禁止。1926年，土耳其共和国开始实施新的民法，该法令废除了一夫多妻制，规定男女平等享有宗教、结婚、离婚和儿童监护权等权利。

马来西亚是首个伊斯兰国家废除“一夫多妻”制的国家，早在1990年代，就停止让已有妻子的男人再婚。

突尼斯虽说是个伊斯兰国家，但在建国初期久废除了一夫多妻制，女性早就在社会上担任着重要的职务。贝宁也在早些年宣布取消了这一严重侵犯妇女权益的落后制度。

The early-stage Mormonism adopted polygamy until 1890 when The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints officially announced the ending of polygamy and since 1904 they’ve adopted the policy of anathematizing the people who still stick to polygamy or forbidding them to join the church.

In China, the first Marriage Law released in 1950 not only carries out the new democratic marriage system with freedom of marriage, equal rights of man and woman, and protecting the lawful rights and interests of women and children, but also regulates explicitly stipulated “monogamy”. There are also specific complementary articles like forbidding bigamous marriage and forbidding married people to live together with other partner to guarantee the rights of women and the interests of the children. In 1997, the Constitution was amended to stipulate the bigamy.

早期的摩门教实行“一夫多妻”，1890年，现时分支耶稣基督后期圣徒教会正式宣布结束多妻制度，并从1904年开始将实行“一夫多妻”制度的会友开除教籍或禁止他们加入教会。

在中国，1950年颁布的第一部《婚姻法》不仅实行男女婚姻自由、男女权利平等、保护妇女和子女合法利益的新民主主义婚姻制度，还明确规定“一夫一妻”，还有针对性地补充了禁止条款，如禁止重婚、禁止有配偶者与他人同居等，确保妇女权利及其子女利益。1997年又修订了《刑法》，规定了重婚罪。

Editor’s note:

编后语：

The first Chinese poetry collection The Book of Songs writes: “In death or life (we are) separated and far apart; with you I made an agreement: I grasped your hand, Together with you I was to grow old.” Marriage is an important part of everybody’s life, and to some extent it reflects the development level of politics, culture, and economy. Due to the factors like history and religion, polygamy will not disappear in a moment, but as human civilization moves forward, monogamy will eventually replace polygamy and become the model of happy life for people to pursue.

中国第一部诗歌总集《诗经》提到:“死生契阔，与子相悦；执子之手，与子偕老。”婚姻在每个人的生命中都扮演着重要角色，婚姻形态在一定程度上反映着政治、文化、经济的发展水平。受历史、宗教等因素的影响，“一夫多妻”制或许不会瞬间消失，但随着人类文明的不断进步，一夫一妻终将取代“一夫多妻”的婚姻制度，成为幸福生活的范本，为世人所追随。