生活,远非如此

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Phillida Eves and her husband Tedd Hamilton weren’t unhappy living in the 2)Galway countryside with their sons, Cian and Oisín, and their daughter, Soracha. “We had a lovely home, a car, lots of friends, and weekends sailing our 3)dinghy,” says Phillida. “But there’s a line from a poem that goes: ‘Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?’ That says it all for me. We felt there was more to life.”

So they quit their jobs, 4)remortgaged the house, took their sons, then aged six and nine, out of school and went to southern Spain where they bought a 15-metre 5)yacht and headed up the coast to 6)Barcelona. Soracha was not even three. And they brought along Poppy, the family dog. Now, two and a half years and 10,000km later, they don’t intend to stop. “Life is choice,” says Phillida, “and we made the decision to do this.” Tedd is a yacht engineer and can find contract work in ports. But, says Phillida, a 7)supply teacher, “any family could do this.”

There are 8)downsides to living on a yacht with three children and a 9)spaniel. “It was hard with my daughter at the beginning,” she says. “You have to know where she is at all times, but we put netting on the rails, and you do get used to it.” The lack of space took adjustment; the boat has four tiny rooms but the family spend most of their time in the 10)cockpit, reading, singing, or playing Lego (it’s often too hot to sit on deck). There is a stove and a fridge, but laundry is done in ports or by filling a 11)paddling pool on deck and letting the kids 12)thrash around in it, along with 13)suds and clothing.

For many of us, the thought of being trapped in a tiny, 14)enclosed space with three young children 24 hours a day is 15)panic-inducing. But, says Phillida, the reality has been liberating: “Our idea of personal space has changed. You need far less stuff than you think you do―the kids have masses of books and Lego, but not much else. And we’ve all learned to respect each other’s space.” 16)Bickering isn’t an issue: “We’ve been amazed at how well the children get on 99% of the time.” Indeed, family 17)dynamics are transformed. “A lot of our life now is about teamwork. We’re 18)interdependent when sailing. We arrive in harbor, one son throws the rope, the other jumps down and ties it off. Tedd is driving, I’m on the back. These aren’t 19)pretend jobs―they’re real.”

The children are 20)home-schooled using a 21)correspondence course. “My son had a recent project on the weather. The weather is crucial to us. We were once caught in a storm in the middle of the night off an Italian island. Our anchor got 22)entangled with another boat and we were being pushed towards each other by a 23)massive wind. We were 24)shoving off each other for half an hour in the 25)pitch black, face to face with panicked strangers unable to hear for the 26)howling wind―it was potentially 27)catastrophic. My son knows more than most adults about weather 28)systems, compasses, maps and directions. The weather, for him, means life or death.”

Other subjects have become equally vivid.“They’re living geography and history all the time. We’ve sailed round Italy, 29)Sardinia, Sicily, and seen tiny islands we didn’t know existed. The kids learned about ancient Romans by visiting Rome. One summer off the Italian coast we sailed past a volcano at 2am. We woke the kids. There it was, under the moon, with fire coming out the top―you don’t get that in a textbook.”

But what about social development? Again, Phillida is 30)sanguine. “The children have become much more socially confident since we set out. They play with tones of families of all nationalities on other boats we meet.”

The family has just sailed through the 31)Corinth Canal and will be crossing the 32)Aegean, through the 33)Dardanelles to 34)Istanbul where they’ll stay for a few months as Tedd holds a job. Beyond that it’s wide open.“We’ve learned to focus on now, rather than plan, plan, plan. We’ll keep going for as long as it feels good.” Living for the moment, they believe, is a huge life lesson. “Our children never say they’re bored.” The other day they stopped mid-ocean and the kids swam, 110km from land. “That’s the kind of freedom we want for them,” says Phillida.“That’s the kind of freedom they’ve got.”

菲莉达・伊夫斯和她的丈夫泰德・汉密尔顿以及他们的儿子西甘和奥伊辛，还有女儿索拉查在戈尔韦的市郊过得并非不快乐。“我们有一个可爱的家、一辆车和许多朋友，周末还常常开着我们的小艇出游，”菲莉达说，“然而一首诗的其中一句这么说道：‘告诉我，疯狂而宝贵的人生仅有一次，你有何打算？’这句诗道出了我的心声。生活，于我们，远非如此而已。”

因此他们辞了工作，抵押了房子，为当时六岁和九岁的儿子办理退学之后，带着他们去了西班牙南部。在那里，他们买了一艘十五米长的游艇，朝着巴塞罗那海岸出发。那时候，索拉查还不到三岁。他们还带上了家中那条名叫波比的狗。如今，游历了两年半，航行了一万公里，他们仍没打算停止脚步。“生活是一个选择，”菲莉达说，“我们选择这么做。”泰德是一名游艇工程师，可以在一些港口找到短期合约工作。不过代课老师菲莉达说，其实“任何家庭都可以这么做。”

与三个小孩和一只西班牙猎犬共同生活在游艇上也有不易之处。“一开始，对我女儿来说比较困难，”她说，“你要时时刻刻留意她在哪里，但是我们在栏杆上围上网，后来你便习惯了。”空间的不足需要他们做出调整：船上有四个小房间，但一家人大多数时间都呆在驾驶舱，看书、唱歌、玩乐高积木（坐在甲板上通常会太热）。船上还有一个炉子和一台冰箱，但是衣服一般在港口洗好，或者在甲板上放一个戏水池，让孩子们在里头掺和着肥皂泡和衣服打打闹闹。

对我们许多人来说，想到每天24小时与三个小孩一起困在一个狭小而封闭的空间里很让人恐慌。但是，菲莉达说，实际上这很自由舒畅：“我们对于个人空间的想法转变了。你需要的东西远远少于你认为需要的――孩子们有大量的书本和乐高积木，其他东西却没多少。并且，我们都学会了尊重各自的空间。”大家不怎么会争吵，“99%的时间里，孩子们都相处得很好，连我们也觉得很诧异。”的确，家中成员之间相处的态势完全改变了。“现在我们的生活讲求的是团队合作，在航行时，我们互相依赖。当船驶达海港，一个儿子负责扔绳子，另一个跳下船，打好结。泰德负责驾驶，我在船尾。这些都不是弄虚作假的工作――都是实干的活儿。”

孩子们在家通过函授课程学习。“我的儿子最近有一个关于天气的课程项目。天气对我们而言很关键。有一次，我们半夜被困于暴风雨中，就在一个意大利岛屿附近。我们的锚与另一只船的锚缠在一起，强劲的风一直把两只船吹向彼此。双方在一片漆黑中碰甩着长达半个小时，试图摆脱纠缠，惶恐的陌生脸孔相对而视，却因为咆哮的风声而听不到对方的话――这极可能带来灾难性的后果。我儿子对天气变化规律、指南针、地图和方向的认识比许多大人更丰富。天气，对他而言，生死攸关。”

其他科目也同样变得很生动。“他们一直生活在地理和历史之中。我们绕着意大利、撒丁岛、西西里航行，目睹了许多过去我们不知道其存在的小岛。孩子们通过游玩罗马来了解古罗马。一个夏天，我们在凌晨两点航行路过意大利沿海的一座火山。我们叫醒孩子们：就在那里，月亮之下，火山顶上还有火喷出来――此情此景你在教科书里是看不到的。”

但是，如何学习社交技能呢？同样的，菲莉达是乐观的。“自从我们出发以来，孩子们在社交方面都变得更加自信。他们与我们在其他船上认识的来自世界各国的家庭玩成一片。”

这个家庭刚刚路过科林斯运河，即将经过爱琴海，在穿过达达尼尔海峡之后到达伊斯坦布尔。他们将在那里呆上几个月，因为泰德在那有份工作。除此之外，他们完全是自由的。“我们学会聚焦眼前，而不是计划、计划再计划。只要感觉良好，我们会继续航行下去。”他们相信，活在当下，是一堂意义深远的生活课程。“我们的孩子从来不会觉得无聊。”某天，他们停在海洋中间，孩子们从离陆地110公里的地方开始游泳。“这就是我们想要给予他们的自由，”菲莉达说，“这就是他们所得到的自由。”