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回忆我的父亲狄更斯

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今年是英国著名作家查尔斯·狄更斯(Charles Dickens)诞辰200周年。作为一名作家,他一生著作无数,代表作《雾都孤儿》《双城记》《大卫·科波菲尔》《远大前程》等多部小说影响深远,成为世界经典名著;作为一位父亲,他对儿女那温柔的关怀和体贴的爱护丝毫不亚于一个慈母。下文节选自狄更斯的女儿玛米·狄更斯(Mamie Dickens)所写的回忆录《回忆我的父亲》(My Father as I Recall Him),描绘了狄更斯鲜为人知的慈父形象,字里行间透露出一个女儿对父亲深深的爱。

From his earliest childhood, throughout his earliest married life to the day of his death, his nature was home-loving. He was a "home man" in every respect2). When he became celebrated at a very early age, as we know, all his joys and sorrows were taken home; and he found there sympathy and the companionship3) of his "own familiar friends". In his letters to these latter, in his letters to my mother, to my aunt, and, later on, to us his children, he never forgot anything that he knew would be of interest about his work, his successes, his hopes or fears. And there was a sweet simplicity in his belief that such news would most certainly be acceptable to all; that is wonderfully touching and child-like coming from a man of genius.

His care and thoughtfulness about home matters, nothing being deemed4) too small or trivial to claim his attention and consideration, were really marvelous5) when we remember his active, eager, restless, working brain. No man was so inclined6) naturally to derive his happiness from home affairs. He was full of the kind of interest in a house which is commonly confined7) to women, and his care of and for us as little children did most certainly "pass the love of women"! His was a tender and most affectionate8) nature.

For many consecutive9) summers we used to be taken to Broadstairs. This little place became a great favorite with my father. He was always very happy there, and delighted in10) wandering about the garden of his house, generally accompanied by one or other of his children. In later years, at Boulogne, he would often have his youngest boy, "The Noble Plorn11)", trotting12) by his side. These two were constant companions in those days, and after these walks my father would always have some funny anecdote to tell us. And when years later the time came for the boy of his heart to go out into the world, my father, after seeing him off, wrote: "Poor Plorn has gone to Australia. It was a hard parting at the last. He seemed to become once more my youngest and favorite little child as the day drew near, and I did not think I could have been so shaken. These are hard, hard things, but they might have to be done without means or influence, and then they would be far harder. God bless him!"

When my father was arranging and rehearsing13) his readings from "Dombey14)", the death of "little Paul" caused him such real anguish15), the reading being so difficult to him, that he told us he could only master his intense emotion by keeping the picture of Plorn, well, strong and hearty, steadily before his eyes. We can see by the different child characters in his books what a wonderful knowledge he had of children, and what a wonderful and truly womanly sympathy he had with them in all their childish joys and griefs. I can remember with us, his own children, how kind, considerate and patient he always was. But we were never afraid to go to him in any trouble, and never had a snub16) from him or a cross17) word under any circumstances. He was always glad to give us "treats", as he called them, and used to conceive all manner of18) those "treats" for us, and if any favor had to be asked we were always sure of a favorable answer. On these occasions my sister "Katie" was generally our messenger, we others waiting outside the study door to hear the verdict19). She and I used to have delightful treats in those summer evenings, driving up to Hampstead20) in the open carriage with him, our mother, and "Auntie", and getting out for a long walk through the lovely country lanes, picking wild roses and other flowers, or walking hand in hand with him listening to some story.

In later years there came changes in our home, inevitable21) changes. But no changes could ever alter22) my father's home-loving nature. As he wrote to Mr. Forster, as a young man, so it was with him to the time of his death: "We shall soon meet, please God, and be happier than ever we were in all our lives. Oh! Home—home—home!!!"

父亲从幼年起,到新婚燕尔,直至辞世的那一天,都是一个爱家的人。不论从哪方面看,父亲都是一个“顾家的男人”。众所周知,父亲少年成名,从那时起,他就把自己在外所有的快乐与忧伤带回家中,而父亲自己也从家里获得了慰藉以及他“熟悉的朋友们”的相伴情谊。在他给这些朋友、给我母亲和姨妈以及后来给我们这些孩子们写的信中,他从未忘记过分享任何他觉得我们感兴趣的事——关于他的工作、他的成功、他的期盼抑或担心。而他这么做的原因简单得可爱:因为他相信这样的消息大家肯定最愿意听。这样的想法出自一个天才真的很令人感动,也很可爱。

在父亲眼中,家事无小事,事无巨细都值得他关心和思虑。每当我们想到他的大脑总是在高速运转,他在饱含激情、笔耕不辍的时候还能对家事如此关注和细心,都觉得这真是太不可思议了。没有哪一个男人像他那样天家,把家事当成快乐的源泉。通常只有女性才会喜欢家事,可父亲却对家里的一切都充满兴趣,他对我们这些小孩子的关心和照顾也的确完全“超越了女性的那种爱”!他就是这样天性温柔,充满慈爱。

连着好几年夏天,父亲都带我们去布罗德斯泰斯避暑。这个小地方成了父亲的最爱。在那里,他总是很快乐,很享受在家里的花园漫步的愉悦,大部分时候身旁都有自己的这个或那个孩子陪着。后来在布洛涅的那几年里,他总是让自己最小的儿子“高雅的普罗恩”小跑着跟在他身边陪他散步。那段日子里,两人常常形影不离。和普罗恩一起散完步后,父亲总会有一些好玩的趣闻轶事要讲给我们听。多年以后,当他心爱的儿子普罗恩离家步入社会的那一刻到来时,父亲在亲自为他送行之后写道:“可怜的普罗恩已经去了澳大利亚。最后的分别尤为艰难。随着离别的日子越来越近,他似乎又一次变回了那个年龄最小、最让我疼爱的小男孩。我从未想过自己竟会如此不安。离别总有千愁万苦,可你却不得不装作若无其事、毫不在意,于是这样的离别就变得更加令人难过。愿上帝保佑他!”

父亲在准备和排练《董贝父子》的作品朗诵表演时(编注:狄更斯从1858年起经常举办作品朗诵会),“小保罗之死”这个部分让他真切地感到了深深的痛苦,朗读的过程于他太过艰难,他告诉我们他只有一直把普罗恩的照片摆在眼前,看着照片中儿子健康强壮、活力四射的样子才能控制住自己心中涌动的强烈情感。父亲在他的作品中塑造了许多不同的儿童形象,从中我们可以看出父亲对儿童的了解多么深刻,他对孩子们所有的快乐与悲伤抱有多么美好而又真诚的、如母性般的同情。我记得父亲和我们这些孩子在一起的时候,总是那么和蔼可亲、体贴入微、无比耐心。而且无论遇到什么麻烦,我们都不会怕去找他,而他无论如何也不会斥责我们,甚至连一句生气的话也从未说过。他总是乐于“款待”我们——他称之为“款待”,而且总能想出各种“款待”我们的法子。如果真有什么事必须要找他帮忙,我们也很有信心能得到想要的答复。每当这种时候,我的妹妹凯蒂一般就负责当我们的信使,而我们其他人就守在书房外面敬候佳音。在那些年的夏天傍晚,我和凯蒂就常常可以开心地享受这样的“款待”。我们俩与父亲、母亲还有“姨妈”一起坐上敞篷马车前往汉普斯特德公园,等下了马车,便沿着长长的、美丽的乡间小路一起散步,一边摘一些野玫瑰或其他野花,或是和父亲手拉着手,边走边听他给我们讲某个故事。

在后来的几年里,家里发生了一些变故,一些不可避免的变故。但无论发生什么变故,都无法改变父亲爱家的本性。正如他年轻时写给福斯特先生的信中所说(这也是他至死都一直坚守的信念):“如系天意,我们很快会相聚,未来的日子里,我们将拥有前所未有的快乐。哦!家啊——我亲爱的家!!!”

1. Mamie Dickens: 玛米·狄更斯(1838~1896),狄更斯的大女儿。她在狄更斯的十个孩子中排行老二,一生未婚,陪狄更斯安度晚年直至他去世。

2. in every respect: 在各方面

3. companionship [kəmˈpæniənʃɪp] n. 友谊;交往

4. deem [diːm] vt. 认为,以为,视为

5. marvelous [ˈmɑːvələs] adj. 令人惊奇的;不可思议的

6. inclined [ɪnˈklaɪnd] adj. 倾向于……的

7. confine [kənˈfaɪn] vt. 限制,使局限

8. affectionate [əˈfekʃənət] adj. 温柔亲切的;出于柔情的

9. consecutive [kənˈsekjətɪv] adj. 连续的

10. delighted in (doing): 从(做某事)中获得快乐

11. The Noble Plorn: 狄更斯对小儿子爱德华·狄更斯(Edward Dickens)的爱称。爱德华·狄更斯(1852~1902)是狄更斯最小的孩子,在狄更斯的鼓励下于1869年移民澳大利亚。

12. trot [trɒt] vi. (人)小步跑,慢跑

13. rehearse [rɪˈhɜːs] vt. 排练;排演;预演(戏剧、舞蹈或音乐作品)

14. Dombey: 指《董贝父子》(Dombey and Son)。《董贝父子》是狄更斯最重要的作品之一,从1846年开始在杂志上连载,至1848年连载完毕。小说主人公Dombey是个冷酷无情的大资本家,视妻儿为他追逐利润的工具。儿子Paul的出生带给他莫大的希望,他从Paul很小的时候就把他当成继承人来培养,剥夺了Paul应有的快乐童年。后来,体弱多病的Paul被送进一所以填塞死知识著称的学校学习,在那里精神饱受摧残,不久以后便死去。

15. anguish [ˈæŋɡwɪʃ] n. (精神上的)极度痛苦,悲痛

16. snub [snʌb] n. 冷落,怠慢

17. cross [krɒs] adj. 生气的;恼怒的

18. all manner of: 形形的,各种各样的

19. verdict [ˈvɜːdɪkt] n. 定论

20. Hampstead: 指汉普斯特德希思高地公园(Hampstead Heath)。它是伦敦一个著名的古老公园,占地320公顷,其历史可追溯至公元986年,至今仍是伦敦人散步和休闲的首选地之一。

21. inevitable [ɪnˈevɪtəbl] adj. 不可避免的,无法规避的

22. alter [ˈɔːltə(r)] vt. 改动,变动