美国老人的中国心
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牧琳爱:出生于中国北戴河的美国人。上世纪30年代,随父母在山东度过了一段难忘的童年后返回美国。60多年之后,重返中国并定居山东,因公益方面的贡献第一个获得“中国绿卡”,至今仍在山东生活。
我的英文名字叫EuniceMoeBrock,翻译成中文是牧琳爱。1917年,我在中国河北北戴河出生。我的父母是从美国来中国传教的传教士,所以我从出生后一直随父母在中国生活,后来随父母的工作辗转来到山东。
我的爸爸是个“中国通”。从我很小的时候起,他就给我灌输很多中国的价值观念。在那里,我度过了难忘的童年。那是一段单纯美好的岁月,中国由此在我心中扎根。以至于当我离开山东、离开了中国后,我魂牵梦绕的地方仍是这里。
13岁时,我随父母回到了美国。那时,正值中国处在动荡不安、战火纷飞的时候,中国老百姓的生活很苦。但作为一个小孩子,我根本没有能力去帮他们,只能带着这份同情离开了中国。
回国后,我像其他美国女性一样开始了普通人的生活:入学读书,参加工作,结婚生子⋯⋯这期间,我还获得了两个博士学位,并担任美国一家儿童医院的院长和当地护士学会主席。我当时在美国的生活很安逸,但是我却忘不了和我共同生活了十多年的中国人。我一直想回去为中国人做些什么。
我对中国的感情,别人无法体会,我的丈夫也不能理解。但我心里一直有个声音:“要回到中国”。
1999年,我从丈夫去世的悲痛中逐渐恢复过来,当时已经82岁了。如果有生之年还是不能回到中国一偿夙愿,那会是我一辈子的遗憾。所以,我不顾儿女反对,卖掉了在美国的40英亩山林和别墅、花园、汽车等家产,一个人到中国寻梦。来到中国后,我还是回到故土。我选择了一个山东的村子长期居住。
这里的居民非常善良。开始的时候他们对我不熟悉,不好意思和我说话,有的小孩一见到我还会哭。不过,现在我们已经非常熟悉了,我成了他们中间的一员。当地政府把村里位置最好的一套院落腾给我居住。
这个农家院落是我在中国的家。我在院子里开辟花园,在院墙上喷绘壁画,在墙根堆假山⋯⋯不过我到现在还是不习惯旱厕,所以对它进行了改造,把一只木凳锯成简易的坐便器架在旱厕的蹲坑上。这个小创新使我的生活更加舒适。
我已经深深爱上了中国农村的朴实生活。我跟四邻八舍的老太太们聊家常、赶大集办置年货、到村里的小学教教英语、到镇上给中学老师培训英语,和市里医院的同行们交流医术心得⋯⋯这些我力所能及的事情让我的生活充满色彩,我的精神世界很富有。
每年的圣诞节,我还会穿上大红色的圣诞服,载上一车的礼物到村里的小学去给孩子们讲故事,送给孩子们圣诞礼物。我这个“圣诞老人”的形象非常受孩子们欢迎。虽然大家并不特别了解圣诞节,但已经把圣诞节作为必过的节日。
我喜欢帮助有困难的中国人,这也是我回到中国的初衷。我给小学、医院、村民捐款捐物,从美国引进优质果树帮助农民致富,给村里的老人治疗白内障、配眼镜⋯⋯对年轻人,我更多的是鼓励。我看到他们,仿佛看到年轻时候的自己。我很喜欢给年轻人讲述自己的人生经历。当遇到挫折或难题时,年轻的朋友们也喜欢找我倾诉。
帮助别人使我自己获得了很大的快乐,我觉得这是我应该做的。善良的中国人授予我“慈善之星”称号,说我是“中华慈善大使”。这些赞誉让我愧不敢当,毕竟我是以回馈的角度来做这些事情的。我的童年同时也是我人生的开端在这里度过,可以说中国和中国人对我的帮助是从我出生就开始的。我能感受到中国人的爱心和友爱,我内心深处很感动。
2009年7月24日,我获得了由山东省公安厅发放的“中国绿卡”,终于了却了我永久留在中国的夙愿。我是一个美国人,但我有一颗中国心。我一直笃信佛教关于人有来生的说法。如果有来生,我想尽快投胎转世,快点长大,然后找到我的丈夫,说服他跟我一起来中国生活。我将以我有限的生命为中国人民服务。
Eunice Moe Brock is an American born in Beidaihe, China. In the 1930s, she spent a memorable childhood in Shandong with her parents and then went back to America. After more than 60 years, she came back to China and settled in Shandong. She won the “Chinese Green Card” for her contribution to public welfare. Now, she still lives in Shandong.
My name is Eunice Moe Brock, and Chinese name is Mu Lin'ai. In 1917, I was born in Beidaihe in Hebei Province, China. My parents were Americans and they did missionary work in China. So, after I was born, I lived in China with my parents and later moved to Shandong because of their work.
My father was an expert on China. Since I was very young, he instilled in me many Chinese values. In China, I spent my memorable childhood. That was a pure and beautiful period of time. From then on, China was deeply rooted in my mind. After I left Shandong, and left China, the place that I missed most was still here.
When I was 13 years old, I went back to America with my parents. At that time, China was convulsed with wars. Life was miserable for the citizens of China. However, as a little child, I was incapable of helping them. So I had to leave China with my sympathy.
After I went back to America, like other American women, I started my normal life: studied in schools, had a job, got married and had children. During this period of time, I got two doctor’s degrees and acted as president of a children’s hospital and chairman of a local nursing college in America. I had an easy life at that time. But I always remembered the Chinese people who lived with me for over 13 years. I always wanted to come back to China and do something for the Chinese people.
Other people didn’t understand my emotion for China including my husband. But there was always a voice in my head: “I must go back to China.”
In 1999, I gradually recovered from the sorrow at the loss of my husband. I was already 82 years old that year. If I couldn’t realize my dream of coming back to China, that would be a lifelong regret. So, despite the opposition of my children, I sold my 40-acre forest, my villa, my garden, and my car, and came to China to pursue my dream by myself. Then I chose to live in a village in Shandong.
The residents in the village are very kind. At the beginning, they were not familiar with me and were shy to talk to me. A child would even look at me and then cry. However, now I am one of them. The local government gave me the courtyard with the best position.
This farmhouse is my home in China. I cultivated a garden in the yard, painted pictures on the walls, and put rockeries at the foot of the wall…Nevertheless, up to now I am still unaccustomed to the dry latrine. I sawed a wooden bench, made it as a frame for the toilet, and put it over the pit. This innovation makes my life more comfortable.
I have deeply loved the simple life in the countryside of China. I often talk with the old ladies living nearby and go to the market with them, teach English in the primary school in the village, train the teachers from the middle schools, and communicate with the doctors in the city hospital. These bring me a colorful life and rich spiritual world.
Every Christmas Day, I wear the red Christmas dress and take a carload of gifts to the children in the village. I tell them the story about Christmas Day and I am always popular with the children. Although the children know little about Christmas Day, they already take Christmas Day as their indispensable festival.