《特别响,非常近》——创伤与救赎

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《特别响，非常近》(Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close)是美国作家乔纳森·萨夫兰·弗尔(Jonathan Safran Foer，1977?)的第二部长篇力作。2002年，弗尔凭借小说《一切皆被照亮》(Everything Is Illuminated)一举成名，引起评论界的广泛关注。他的作品情节杂乱却思想丰富，叙事琐碎但风格新颖，特立独行的写作手法令他独树一帜、享誉文坛。

下文选自《特别响，非常近》的最后一章。

精彩片段

I felt in the space between the bed and the wall, and found Stuff That Happened to Me. It was completely full. I was going to have to start a new volume soon. I read that it was the paper that kept the towers burning. All of those notepads, and Xeroxes1), and printed emails, and photographs of kids, and books, and dollar bills in wallets, and documents in files, all of them were fuel2). Maybe if we lived in a paperless society, which lots of scientists say we'll probably live in one day soon, Dad would still be alive. Maybe I shouldn't start a new volume.

I grabbed the flashlight from my backpack and aimed it at the book. I saw maps and drawings, pictures from magazines and newspapers and the Internet, pictures I'd taken with Grandpa's camera. The whole world was in there. Finally, I found the pictures of the falling body.

Was it Dad?

Maybe.

Whoever it was, it was somebody.

I ripped the pages out of the book.

I reversed3) the order, so the last one was first, and the first was last.

When I flipped through them, it looked like the man was floating up through the sky.

And if I'd had more pictures, he would've flown through a window, back into the building, and the smoke would've poured into the hole that the plane was about to come out of.

Dad would've left his messages backward, until the machine was empty, and the plane would've flown backward away from him, all the way to Boston.

He would've taken the elevator to the street and pressed the button for the top floor.

He would've walked backward to the subway, and the subway would've gone backward through the tunnel, back to our stop.

Dad would've gone backward through the turnstile4), then swiped his metrocard5) backward, then walked home backward as he read The New York Times from right to left.

He would've spit coffee into his mug, unbrushed his teeth, and put hair on his face with a razor6).

He would've gotten back into bed, the alarm would've rung backward, he would've dreamt backward.

Then he would've gotten up again at the end of the night before the worst day.

He would've walked backward to my room, whistling "I Am the Walrus" backward.

He would've gotten into bed with me.